Ashworth Alcove

As spring came, he left. The trees were beginning to bloom, adding a sweetness to the air. The earth was beginning to wake up once again. It was ironic, saying goodbye. Spring normally doesn't feel quite so heavy. Ways are typically parted at a large public gathering with all of the soldiers and their family. It was different this time. Ben's departure was pushed back (and pushed back again), which landed our goodbyes at the Seattle airport because our flight was leaving a couple days before his. It wasn't what we had planned, but all plans are tentative with the military. In a way, it was easier. Saying goodbye at the departure ceremony last time was miserable. The air felt painfully heavy and every child clung to their mother or father pleading with them to stay. We said our goodbyes on our own terms this time. There was a bit more privacy, though our fellow travelers couldn't resist staring and offering little smiles when our eyes met. I recall the sinking feelin...

There's really no way to prepare for a deployment. There are different emotional stages that come with it. The time leading up to departure is the most tense. My emotions are like a one woman roller coaster ride. This is the first stage - denial. You fight the reality that he is leaving. The truth is he is leaving, no matter what. Earlier today Violet wandered off into the guest room. It's full of Ben's Army stuff and she loves to get into things in there. I knew that's where she had disappeared to and as I approached the room I heard the familiar jingle of Ben's dog tags. She played and examined them (and maybe chewed on them) for twenty minutes, adding such an innocence to everything that's about to happen.

Ben is leaving for Afghanistan in two weeks. This deployment is like the last in that we are saying our see you laters in March once again. It's a dismal month for me.  When you have a military family your entire life is a series of countdowns. Countdowns to deployments, to homecomings, to moves - just always crossing off days until the next big thing. This deployment will be harder for both of us for one small but big reason.

Growth & Appearance: Your hair has a golden quality in natural light (when the sun actually comes out - we are in Washington state after all). I wouldn't be surprised if it has a honey tone about it in the summers throughout your childhood. Surprisingly, my hair was practically white when I was very young. Around 4 years it transitioned to brown. Just sayin'. You have some new hair growth around your crown, so that area usually looks frazzled. You weigh 22.5 lbs and are 29-ish inches long. 12 month clothing. Size 4 diapers. Teeth: Seven teeth now. You've recently sprouted a new bottom one on March 2. We try to always brush your teeth before bedtime. You don't mind. I had to ditch that measly little rubber finger brush though. Those things are dangerous, you about took my finger off multiple times. Teething for you equals fighting your sleep, weird diarrhea, clinginess, and a general whiny disposition. Development:   Something I forgot to mentio...

We live about 40 minutes south of Seattle. Ben is on his pre-deployment leave and we decided to spend a couple of days exploring the city. Even though it's a quick drive, we decided to stay the night so we could relax and spend two days doing one of my favorite things - loafing. Exploring is interesting with a 9 month old. You have to move efficiently to get things in between nap times. Violet isn't one to take naps while we're out and about in the carrier. She won't really nap in strange places at all. We got a hotel in prime location to retreat to for nap time. Everything was within walking distance. We took a ride on Seattle's "Great Wheel". I can't even remember the last time I was on a ferris wheel. Fortunately, the buckets were enclosed, so I didn't have to worry about holding onto my overly-squirmy baby trying to go sky-diving. I still haven't adjusted to seeing snow-capped mountains along the horizon. We had a b...