Meet Your Parents



Dear Violet,

At mine and your Daddy's wedding reception we were under a severe tornado warning. Warning. As in, there was a tornado... on the ground. Some full-blown Aunty Em commotion. The rain beat against the windows, the thunder rattled them. We should have been taking cover. We should have stopped celebrating.

Instead, we danced. We danced the best dancing we've ever done to a live band playing 'Last Dance with Mary Jane.' The band played and we celebrated the coming of the new year.

After we rang our hearts out on the dance floor, we made our way through the torrential rain to our cabin at David Crockett State Park. He never carried me over the threshold. I could make up all kinds of believable reasons why this long-held custom failed to happen, but I'm pretty fond of the truth. And the truth is we were really really drunk.

I had a startling streak of crimson stained down the front of my white dress. There are times you ask someone to hold your drink, that time didn't come on this particular night. I had a year's supply of hair product in my hair, because those vintage hairstyles are no joking business

What I didn't have, was shampoo. For reasons I can't explain to you, because I don't know them myself, I had my mind set on washing my hair before going to bed. As luck would have it, the cabin didn't provide any tiny bottles of shampoo, just a tiny bar of soap.

My brain thought it was a good idea to wash my hair with that bar of soap. Now, this is important. Do not, under any circumstance, attempt to wash your hair with a bar of soap. Especially cheap hotel bars of soap that aren't even soap to begin with.

 Moral of this story:
When life calls for a celebration, celebrate.
Opt for dirty hair.

Mama & Daddy

Comments

  1. Emily ShoretteMarch 16, 2017 at 9:41 PM

    If you have a minute, I’d really appreciate it if you took a look at Emily’s Virtual Rocket. This is a serious newsblog which has been taken from e-newspapers and e-magazines from around the world, with an emphasis on transgender issues. Also, with his election, I look for articles which critique Donald Trump.

    I hope you enjoy this. Please paste the following:

    Emilysvirtualrocket.blogspot.com

    If you like it, please consider putting it among your favorite blogs. I would greatly appreciate it.


    Emily

    ReplyDelete

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